..erase & rewind

(late at monday night) beeping :
mg lalu kita s4 punya mslh kan? eh skrg back on the right track. trus ntar ya depends on ur decission.
what do you do if someone asking like this?
rasanya seperti udah di hapus dalam memory pikiran & hati tapi ketika baru melangkah 3 atau empat ayunan..eh di tarik kembali.
I wanna say yes but I need time untuk menyakinkan kalo ini yang aku mau, dan juga melihat kesungguhan hatinya. Semoga he doesn't give up yet with me...
My dear Sis told me if I got principle I will not confussed, then my buddy ask what I feel about this guy? hmm I like him that's true, so he said then go lah..
but I listen to my heart..I wait till I ready..and I hope I will pick up the right hint.
I hope and praying..

L..O..V..I..N..G

"loving is not forgetting but how you forgive it, loving is not hearing but to listen, loving is not letting it go but holding on"

some advantages of being single

1. You are independent. Basically you can do what you want when you want. You don't have to wait, you don't have to ask, you can just go.
2. You have more time When you're single; you don't have to sit around doing nothing. Want to go to the gym? Want to join the hiking club? Play an instrument? How about watch your favorite video for 10th time? Want to take a course? Learn a new hobby? Who's stopping you?
3. You don't have to deal with another's personal habits. You can sleep without listening to someone's snoring and hog all the blankets all the time and nobody cares. You don't have to pick up after anyone but yourself. And you don't even have to pick up after yourself if you don't want to. Give your patience a well-deserved break.
4. You can be spontaneous Be daring! Do what you want when you want to and who cares if you don't get to dinner until midnight? Do something out of the ordinary, without having to get permission first or calling ahead. This is freedom!
5. You can focus on your career. You can channel your energy into your work. Without a relationship, you have a lot more time. Put in those extra hours and impress your boss, or take on new projects.
6. You are your own boss. Relationships need compromise and you don't always get your own way. Both people in a relationship have to give something up for the greater good of the relationship. Do what you want and treat yourself more. Selfishness is good for the soul (in small doses).
Don't stress! That special someone is out there and you can and will find them. It just takes time.In the meantime, enjoy being single. In fact, I believe that if you can't be happy being single, you will never be happy with your soulmate! Kind of like rich and poor.
There are lots of poor people who are happy and lots that are unhappy. Same with rich people -- lots are happy and lots are unhappy. Now what do you think would happen if we took a poor who was unhappy, and gave them lots of money?You guessed it! They would probably be happy for a short time, but it wouldn't last and eventually they would be just as unhappy as they were.Ever wonder why that is? Being happy comes from inside of you not outside.
OK, you are single -- enjoy yourself and that special person will come along before you know it!
http://www.bigdaddybruce.com

Kau pikir kaulah segalanya??

selasa, 21 Maret
06:12 WIB
sms dari +316262.."Aku ngga bisa tidur nih kepikiran kamu terus. Sebenarnya aq ngga mau nyakitin kamu, tapi aku ngga tau bagaimana caranya supaya tidak menyakiti kamu. Bingung kan?”

12:15 WIB
To : andw..@...
Subject : ngga ngerti
Dear Andw,
Gue ngga ngerti apa yang dimaksud dengan ngga mau nyakitin tapi ngga tau bagaimana caranya supaya tidak menyakiti kamu. Kata-kata yang klise! I still have a picture of you in my mind but you are right when you say “aku tidak mau mempertaruhkan hidupku dan membuat kesalahan yang ke dua kali. Gimana mau serius kalau hanya mengenal kamu di permukaan saja, you are free to move on kalau kamu pikir kamu menyukai orang itu dan lebih baik dari aku.” Those words hit me but what can I say.. the choice is made, I will go on my way dan menutup suatu episode dari cerita cintaku. I feel glad because you had telling me what’s inside your heart. As you said, tidak ada gunanya menunggu sesuatu yang tidak pasti. Lewat email ini saya mau bilang “if you are not ready to be hurt then you are not ready to give love”. Ngga usah dipikirin apa yang sudah lewat, toh mentari tetap bersinar, musim berlalu, ada saatnya cinta bertumbuh, mati dan bertumbuh. Kisah kita telah usai.
12:30 WIB message to andw..@... remove from draft to recycle bin.

Sebenarnya..

Sebenarnya nama kamu sudah terdelete mas..
Kalau kamu online terus aku sign out itu karena kebetulan, gimana aku tau kamu online, ID kamu sudah di delete. Nyesel? sampai hari ini engga, abiz aku cape baca kalimat-kalimat tersurat kamu. Diberi harapan kemudian di hempaskan lagi. Bahkan nomormu sudah aku delete, dugh kalo yang satu ini kecelakaan ga bermaksud menghapus semuanya, tadinya cuma satu nomor. Itu aja sih pengakuanku yah kalo ada sumur di ladang boleh kita berjumpa lagi.....maksudnya?! yaah kalo kamu menghubungi atau IM-in aku sebisa mungkin aku jawab.
Ketika aku bilang cukup..kamu bingung sendiri kan? iih aku menikmati sekali permainan ini.
Until then..

...Pakai sepatumu, pasang senyummu...

Maju terus pantang mundur..gunakan waktu seefisien dan seefektif mungkin, when you are in dead relationship just move-on, pakai sepatumu-pasang senyummu ayo cari lagi..
Mereka tidak akan peduli how you achieve something, hanya melihat hasil akhir, yang peduli terus siapa? yah kita sendiri, so jangan breakable donk. Walau pahit, hadapi dengan lapang dada..iih suseh yah berlapang dada. Walau suseh tapi bukan ga mungkin kan?

tu wa..ga pat..buang sakit hatimu nanti kami jenguk pasanglah senyummu pakailah sepatumu ayo terus maju cari pacar baru..ini kata-kata koq ngga nyambung!

kubaca lagi emailmu

Kenapa pertanyaan yang kelihatannya sederhana menjadi susah dijawab? apa karena gue bingung, ga pasti dan ga tau mesti menjawab apa? buat gue untuk menjawab pertanyaan yang mudah ini seperti membongkar kembali kotak tua. Hasilnya?
unbelievable..gue masih punya email dari dia dari tahun 2003. Hah? trus beberapa pertanyaan-pertanyaan singkat dia yang ngga gue jawab. Ketika gue bongkar lagi outlook express gue..astaga..dia masih memforward ke alamat email gue yang sudah lama sekali ngga pernah gue pakai. Ada saatnya dia seperti my morning call, kemudian waktu mengubahnya menjadi orang yang susah ditemui sampai gue tau kalo dia sudah menghapus nomor gue dari phone book-nya dan gue malakukan hal yang sama. Sekarang dia datang dan bertanya nomor hp gue.
Kenapa cerita ini jadi panjang gini yah..dan cukup complicated..
Apa yah sekarang ini waktu yang tepat?

Bertahan Untuk Cinta (ehmm ehmm)

terbang aku ke angkasa biru
terbius aku oleh pesona syurgawi
terlepas aku dan biarkan melayang indah
oleh pesona pancaran dirimu yang memikat lembut jiwaku
kuingin pastikan ini bukan sekedar mimpi
tetapi kalaupun ini mimpi biarkan ku terlena olehnya
karena ini merupakan mimpi terindah dalam hidupku
yang membuatku damai dan tentram olehnya
hadirmu memberi jiwa yang damai untukku
bagaikan singgasana emas di istana raja
layaknya permadani dunia disemenanjung katulistiwa
itulah pesona dirimu merasuk kalbu
ingin kumiliki dirimu dalam hati selamanya
bukan karena egois tapi karena aku mencintainya
mencintai sesuatu yang indah sebagai karunia Illahi
aku akan bertahan untuk cinta bukan untuk dirinya
dialah sesuatu yang tlah kutemukan dalam langkahku
semoga pesonanya akan slalu mengiringi perjalananku
oh....Peguasa alam takjub aku melihat karya-Mu
semoga restu-Mu slalu mengiringi langkah perjalananku

Created by

Richardo Steven B.

Timing is Everything (I refused to give up)

Those words seems perfect to describe my life recently. Started when I have a little discussion with Bo, then we ended in a conclusion..yep we believe in "timing". Let's say I really want to move to another job and company and I have applied for more than 10 companies, and attended some interview but in some reasons the companies still not hiring me. Is it timing isn't? I go for interview and I was so full of confidence but I'm not yet having the job. I believe the time was not right. But if I try and try again I believe I will have a new job as I want it but it takes time to be there.

The problem is some are giving up some are refused to give up.
Not in job matters in relationship I believe timing is everything, no matter how hard I keep the relations but if the other person in that time not considering as important as I am it won't worked. So it is right, timing is everything!

and honey do you think now is the right time for us ? I hope so because the feeling is still there...

Dia lagi..

This is my journal, this is my life, this is about Dia..
Dia yang pernah mengisi hatiku
Dia yang pernah membuatku kecewa
Dia yang pernah membuatku marah dan kesal
Dia yang pernah membawa senyum di wajahku
Dia yang pernah menyita pikiranku
dan terkadang semuanya kembali di suatu waktu..apakah ini waktu yang tepat?
Timing is everything..

Don't sway..I need you to stay